Thursday, May 27, 2010

*anybody* can make these enchiladas

Men who play football, have lots of chest hair, and dislike Pride and Prejudice can make these enchiladas.

Vegetarians and vegans can make these enchiladas.

People with no skill can make these enchiladas.

Amoebae can make these enchiladas.

Glow-worms can make these enchiladas.

Bacteriophages can make these enchiladas.

The only things that cannot make these enchiladas are bodiless entities

unless they are angels or God.

There are two types of people who can make these enchiladas but should not make these enchiladas:

(a) those who don't like Mexican food

and (b) those who like Mexican food enough to realize that these are not authentic.

I learned about these enchiladas from my dad, who got the recipe from a (male) friend while a group of them (men) were watching a hockey game. The recipe is easily adjustable for vegetarians and vegans. And it's really, really simple.

You will need:
tortillas (plan on one for each woman and 487 for each man)
enchilada sauce (plan on one can per four enchiladas)
shredded cheese (except vegans)
filler (see below)
cookie sheet or other metal rectangle pan
oven (and of course pot holders)

Lay the tortilla flat. Put the filler on top in a line running the diameter of the tortilla. Fold the two sides over the filler, then flip the entire enchilada over so the "flaps" are on bottom. It should stay shut. Make a bunch of these and line them up on the cookie sheet. Then drizzle enchilada sauce and sprinkle cheese over all of them. Bake at 350 for about half an hour or until the cheese is melted but not burnt.

ground beef or chicken (brown/cook this before making the enchiladas)
enchilada sauce
pinto beans
black beans
refried beans
green peppers
chili powder
cayene pepper
sour cream
lemon juice or peel

You can use pretty much whatever you want. If you don't like beans, don't use beans. If you're vegetarian, don't use ground beef. If you're allergic to onions, don't use onions. If you have a group of some vegans and some football players, make some enchiladas without meat and cheese and some enchiladas with the entire list, plus a cow and three or four whole chickens inside. If they look all the same on the cookie sheet, use frilly toothpicks to label them.

You can't go wrong with a meal that uses frilly toothpicks.

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